(no subject)
May. 23rd, 2008 12:34 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
trinsyOkay, so I downloaded the audiobook of Twilight this afternoon and listened to first four chapters. And honestly? I kind of hate it. It's so, so angsty. It's so stupidly angsty. And Bella is kind of a bitch. And Edward is really boring. He's too pretty and perfect, and he's way too mysterious. He's so mysterious, I'm not even curious about him. He's so mysterious that he's come right back around to boring.
Anyway, I'm still going to listen to it, at least until the part with the vampires, because maybe it gets better? I don't know, but I feel like I should at least give it that chance. I had to find a way to keep myself sane, though, so I took notes while I listened.
Anyway, I'm still going to listen to it, at least until the part with the vampires, because maybe it gets better? I don't know, but I feel like I should at least give it that chance. I had to find a way to keep myself sane, though, so I took notes while I listened.
Chapter 1:
• Story begins. Angst, angst, angst. Not a good sign.
• Who the hell is Charlie?
• Ah. Charlie = Dad. Why do you call him “Charlie”, then?
• Angst, angst, angsty angst angst. If you hate Forks so much, why did you choose to move here?
• Physical description = another chance to angst. This is starting to read like a bad fanfic.
• First day of school, angsty angst angst. You are a snobby big city girl who dislikes small towns. I empathize … to a point. The difference between us is that you chose to move. Therefore, you don’t get to complain.
• The Cullens are pretty, mysterious, ooohhh. How many times can you use the word “graceful” in a paragraph?
• Edward doesn’t like you, angsty angst. He probably sensed all your angst and was repulsed by it.
• You have to take Gym all four years, oh noes!
• OMG, if you hate Forks that much GO HOME and SHUT UP!
• Edward still hates you. Cry moar, emo girl!
Chapter 2:
• You have friends at school, YAYS! Still angsty, though. Trig sucks. Gym sucks. Edward gone, oh noes! Angsty angst.
• Mike likes you, but you don’t like him. Wow, what a rough life you have. I feel so bad for you. Edward, Edward, angsty angst angst.
• Wow, even food is an excuse to angst.
• Edward still hasn’t come to school, oh noes again!
• You hate Washington beaches. Bitch.
• Bad library, angst angst. Why does it seem like main characters in books always like to read? Biased much?
• OMG, you’re actually starting to kind of like it here? But how will you angst???
• Ah, snow. New opportunity to angst.
• Mike thinks you’re an idiot for not knowing what snow looks like. I kind of love Mike now.
• Edward back, oh noes x3!!! But now he’s nice. I’m bored of the Cullens’ and Hales’ prettiness now.
• Edward = Marty Poppins: practically perfect in every way. I’m still bored by this.
• Okay, I do feel a bit bad for you now because of the whole remarriage thing. Still bored by Edward’s prettiness, though.
Chapter 3:
• Snow = more angst!
• OMG, you’re such a snobby bitch! Your friends are nice, and you don’t even deserve friends if you can’t appreciate them!
• Boys here fancy you, angst angst angst! Cry moar, I feel so bad for you!
• Aww, daddy loves you! Angst angst. Also, stop calling him “Charlie”, damn it! It’s pointlessly confusing.
• Edward saves you, YAYS! (I am less thrilled by this news as it means the book is still going on.) You don’t know how. More confusion will doubtless mean more angst. I can’t wait.
• Wow, ungrateful much? Neck brace, embarrassing, angst angst! How terrible it must be to have people actually care about you!
• Edward is still pretty. Edward’s dad is pretty too. *yawn*
• Edward won’t explain himself, angsty angst angst.
• You’re still a bitch about your friends. I’m still annoyed about that.
Chapter 4:
• Dream!Edward, angst angst angst.
• People still care about you, more boys fancy you. Naturally more angst ensues.
• You fancy Edward. Edward ignores you. Angsty angst.
• Stop calling your parents by their first names! Argh!
• School dance = chance for more angst. Mike, you deserve better than this bitch! Stop being an idiot! *fangirls Mike despite his bad taste in women*
• Edward looked at you, YAYS! He is still pretty. I am still bored. Can we just get to the part with the vampires already?
• Gym still sucks. At this point, I feel like you’re just making up excuses to angst.
• Eric and Tyler also fancy you. Could your life suck more?
• Edward says you shouldn’t be friends, angst angst. You’re right, you’re not interesting! But neither is Edward! He’s too pretty and too prefect! This reads like a manual for how not to write a story.
• Edward setting up the Tyler thing amuses me. First time I’ve felt engaged with the story since it started.
• Somehow, I can’t even be happy that things are starting to develop with Edward as this can surely only mean more angst.
• Story begins. Angst, angst, angst. Not a good sign.
• Who the hell is Charlie?
• Ah. Charlie = Dad. Why do you call him “Charlie”, then?
• Angst, angst, angsty angst angst. If you hate Forks so much, why did you choose to move here?
• Physical description = another chance to angst. This is starting to read like a bad fanfic.
• First day of school, angsty angst angst. You are a snobby big city girl who dislikes small towns. I empathize … to a point. The difference between us is that you chose to move. Therefore, you don’t get to complain.
• The Cullens are pretty, mysterious, ooohhh. How many times can you use the word “graceful” in a paragraph?
• Edward doesn’t like you, angsty angst. He probably sensed all your angst and was repulsed by it.
• You have to take Gym all four years, oh noes!
• OMG, if you hate Forks that much GO HOME and SHUT UP!
• Edward still hates you. Cry moar, emo girl!
Chapter 2:
• You have friends at school, YAYS! Still angsty, though. Trig sucks. Gym sucks. Edward gone, oh noes! Angsty angst.
• Mike likes you, but you don’t like him. Wow, what a rough life you have. I feel so bad for you. Edward, Edward, angsty angst angst.
• Wow, even food is an excuse to angst.
• Edward still hasn’t come to school, oh noes again!
• You hate Washington beaches. Bitch.
• Bad library, angst angst. Why does it seem like main characters in books always like to read? Biased much?
• OMG, you’re actually starting to kind of like it here? But how will you angst???
• Ah, snow. New opportunity to angst.
• Mike thinks you’re an idiot for not knowing what snow looks like. I kind of love Mike now.
• Edward back, oh noes x3!!! But now he’s nice. I’m bored of the Cullens’ and Hales’ prettiness now.
• Edward = Marty Poppins: practically perfect in every way. I’m still bored by this.
• Okay, I do feel a bit bad for you now because of the whole remarriage thing. Still bored by Edward’s prettiness, though.
Chapter 3:
• Snow = more angst!
• OMG, you’re such a snobby bitch! Your friends are nice, and you don’t even deserve friends if you can’t appreciate them!
• Boys here fancy you, angst angst angst! Cry moar, I feel so bad for you!
• Aww, daddy loves you! Angst angst. Also, stop calling him “Charlie”, damn it! It’s pointlessly confusing.
• Edward saves you, YAYS! (I am less thrilled by this news as it means the book is still going on.) You don’t know how. More confusion will doubtless mean more angst. I can’t wait.
• Wow, ungrateful much? Neck brace, embarrassing, angst angst! How terrible it must be to have people actually care about you!
• Edward is still pretty. Edward’s dad is pretty too. *yawn*
• Edward won’t explain himself, angsty angst angst.
• You’re still a bitch about your friends. I’m still annoyed about that.
Chapter 4:
• Dream!Edward, angst angst angst.
• People still care about you, more boys fancy you. Naturally more angst ensues.
• You fancy Edward. Edward ignores you. Angsty angst.
• Stop calling your parents by their first names! Argh!
• School dance = chance for more angst. Mike, you deserve better than this bitch! Stop being an idiot! *fangirls Mike despite his bad taste in women*
• Edward looked at you, YAYS! He is still pretty. I am still bored. Can we just get to the part with the vampires already?
• Gym still sucks. At this point, I feel like you’re just making up excuses to angst.
• Eric and Tyler also fancy you. Could your life suck more?
• Edward says you shouldn’t be friends, angst angst. You’re right, you’re not interesting! But neither is Edward! He’s too pretty and too prefect! This reads like a manual for how not to write a story.
• Edward setting up the Tyler thing amuses me. First time I’ve felt engaged with the story since it started.
• Somehow, I can’t even be happy that things are starting to develop with Edward as this can surely only mean more angst.